Sunday, on the days that we have church lunches, we often have a competition, of who can bring the best thing to the shared lunch. This time 'round, I made a Pav.

3 Egg Whites
3 Tablespoons cold water
1 cup castor sugar
1Tsp Vinegar
1Tsp Vanilla Essence
3Tsp Cornflour

Beat egg whites until stiff, add cold water and beat again. Add castor sugar very gradually while still beating. Slow beater and add vinegar, vanilla and cornflour. Place on greased paper on greased tray and bake at 150 degrees C for 45 minutes, then leave to cool in the oven.

This one at the beginning was going to either be about a kitchen where implements of terror are made or about a p lab. I just thought that I might need to explain it a bit more.

The Synthesis

Heat radiated from the discoloured aluminium pot on the stove, the flames from the gas fire enveloping the exposed metal with a soft blue haze. The hand inhabiting the perishing yellow rubber glove grasped the corroded long handled spoon made out of indeterminable materials and slowly, carefully stirred the opaque mucilaginous liquid. The hand performing this potentially dangerous task belonged to John. With his other hand, the now slightly apprehensive John turned on the air vent. The poisonous fumes surged from the incandescent flames, the smoky gaseous vapour climbed as it was sucked into the tube through the fan, wafting into the clean air outside, warming the earth by some ingenious method whereby the gas in question was able to either retain the heat, or somehow reflect it better than it’s neighbouring molecules of nitrogen and oxygen, somehow insulating the earth better from the coldness of the vacuum of space. With a slightly shaking hand (coffee) John poured the rapidly jellifying plastic explosive into a square steel container to set. C4. Guaranteed to obliterate the competition.

La Pavlova es bonito